Of Time and Waiting

“I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope.” – Psalm 130:5

 

You told me that you will meet me at the point of faith. Then Father, help me extend my faith up until that time, up until that moment, where you will meet me at the end of this crooked road.

 

How it has been a journey, God. How many times have I told you no. How many I cant’s have you heard? How have I provoked your anger when I told you I’m fine on my own? Who said the time of waiting is easy? No, it has never been. One second you’re okay, and then on the other something happens that makes your self-worth hit rock bottom, and then you think of giving up. You think of ways on how to detach yourself from this situation because it’s giving you so much pain. I can always give up. I can always run away.

 

Only. I have your Word with me. You said it. I must believe it. And that should be enough.

 

So now, I give to you every second of my waiting, Lord. I give to you every bit of it. Use it for Your glory. Use it to mold me, to shape me, until I become more like You. Help me think less of myself in this destiny and help me think more of You and how can this fulfill the purposes of Your heart. Afterall, you told me before that You have called me for this, not for my happiness or for anyone’s happiness, but for Your own enjoyment. Father, I want you to delight in me. So help me cling on Your word. I can’t assure You that I can. I am weak as I am. But help me.

 

I look to You.

I look to You.

At the end of this tunnel, I’m going to meet You and You will tell me, you did well.

When that time comes, I’m sure it will all be worth it.

 

I look to You. I have decided to look to You and to wait upon You. To wait for nothing and no one, just You. I won’t wait for the destiny, I will wait for the author of my destiny. And that’s you, my God.

 

Every second. It’s yours. And the time starts now.

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